December Read/3

Title: Supersurvivors: The Surprising Link Between Suffering and Success

Author: Feldman, David; Kravet, lee Daniel

Call Number: 155.24 F312S 2014

Subject(s):

Number of Pages: 243

ISBN: 9780062267856

Book Description from amazon.com:

            Starting where resiliency studies leave off, two psychologists explore the science of remarkable accomplishment in the wake of trauma, revealing the surprising principles that allow people to transform their lives and achieve extraordinary things.
Over four billion people worldwide will survive a trauma during their lives. Some will experience severe post-traumatic stress. Most will eventually recover and return to life as normal. But sometimes, survivors do more than bounce back. Sometimes they bounce forward.
These are the Supersurvivors—individuals who not only rebuild their lives, but also thrive and grow in ways never previously imagined. Beginning where resilience ends, David B. Feldman and Lee Daniel Kravetz look beyond the tenets of traditional psychology for a deeper understanding of the strength of the human spirit. What they have found flies in the face of conventional wisdom—that positive thinking may hinder more than help; that perceived support can be just as good as the real thing; and that realistic expectations may be a key to great success.
They introduce the humble but powerful notion of grounded hope as the foundation for overcoming trauma. The authors interviewed dozens of men and women whose stories serve as the counterpoint to the latest scientific research. Feldman and Kravetz then brilliantly weave these extraordinary narratives with new science, creating an emotionally compelling and thought-provoking look at what is possible in the face of human tragedy. Supersurvivors will reset our thinking about how we deal with challenges, no matter how big or small.

My Read:

            “Before I die, I want to _______________.” What will you fill in the blank to complete this simple phrase? It’s a question stenciled on a wall by a lady named Candy Chang who moved to New Orleans in 2010 after the strike of Hurricane Katrina. It’s one of the survivors’ stories told in this book. It’s the second time I read Ms. Chang’s story and the question she posted. Though there are many possible answers for me to fill in the blank I am still pondering upon the question.

            The following are notes I took while reading this book:

“Giving up is sometimes the only way to move forward.”-page 28 This phrase came from the chapter “The Paradox of Positive Thinking.” To give up false hope might help a person to reassess the facts and make a better decision.

“These successful people are all delusional!” This is not to be misinterpreted as a bad thing. In fact, being delusional helps us become more effective. By definition, these delusions don’t have to be accurate. If they were totally accurate, your goals would be too low.”-page 41 The author further states “Successful people fail a lot, but they try a lot, too. When things don’t work, they move on until an idea does work.” –page 41

“People who believe they can succeed see opportunities where others see threats.”-page 42

“Hopeful thinkers tend to use more problem-focused coping.”-page 43

“Pain will change you. It does change you. But so does knowledge.”-page 203

“We have only a limited amount of time before we die, and there’s nothing to do but make the most meaningful choices possible.” –page 116 This saying reminds me of why I like the place in which I am making a living. The workplace helps me recognize my own identity, identify meaning and purpose of a life, and understand that I am simply another human being, like everyone else. It’s a blessing to know that being alive is just a breathing after another; everyone is the same. We used to hear people said “life is short.” But did you ever wonder how short life could be? It’s just a breath away.

            I found this phrase worth of pondering and reflecting. It says: “Without forgiveness there is no hope.”-page 161

            Throughout the whole book, readers would frequently come across this question “What now?”  To let go of the past is hard. To spend too much on worrying about the future is not too wise. So it’s left to the question: What now?